Balance

Let’s face it; your whole life has been thrown out of kilter.  Your sleeping and eating patterns have been interrupted, your hormones have shifted, your relationship with your partner has changed and you’re not even sure exactly how just yet.

All you know is you have entered a new stage of life and it is exhilarating, frustrating, delightful, exhausting, disorienting and beautiful all at the same time.

Maintaining balance in life is always challenging yet fundamentally important. It is even more important now that you are a new mom.

In modern life we juggle countless things and many of us pride ourselves on being able to multi-task.  But the truth is that when we take on many things at once, we dilute our focus and therefore are unable to fully experience, appreciate or execute any one thing effectively.

One benefit of being a new parent is that your main responsibility now is crystal clear.  Your new baby’s needs are the most important thing in your life; there is no doubting that.  But they are not the only needs that must be met.

Your needs are vital too.  You need to rest, you need to take all the time required to heal and, most importantly, you need to fully absorb, appreciate and experience being a new mother.  And you need to maintain and nourish a loving relationship with your partner, the father of your child. The challenge is figuring out bringing balance into your life.

So how the heck do you do that?!?

One thing that can help is to visualize tightrope walkers.  Picture in your mind’s eye how they manage to stay balanced on that razor thin wire.

First and foremost, they take their time.  They stay fully concentrated on simply putting one foot in front of the other and are 100% engaged with the experience of each and every step.  They never focus on how far they have left to go.

If you watch closely you can see that they teeter and totter this way and that a lot, but they are not afraid of the sway.  The little wobbles that momentarily take them off course do not concern them because they trust they can make whatever small corrections are needed.

Most importantly, they do not judge themselves and they do not allow distractions, they can’t afford to.

You can utilize these skills in navigating your life as a new mom.  A great place to start is by eliminating unnecessary distractions like social media, too much TV and unnecessary social engagements.

Next remember to fully engage in each task of the day, no matter how mundane. Be fully focused on changing that diaper, doing the laundry or washing dishes.  Enjoy the sweet smell of the dish soap, lavish in the warmth of the towels as you pull them from the dryer. Allow yourself this luxury. If you do you’ll be surprised at how much more you will enjoy each task.

Next, don’t be alarmed with little challenges as they arise, know that you can weave and sway as necessary to meet whatever comes your way.

Most importantly, do not judge the situation or yourself. Just remember to put one foot in front of the other the best you can. Let your mantra be “one careful, thoughtful step at a time.”